Living on Autopilot and Calling It Progress

Many of us are very good at doing what we are supposed to do.

We follow the path that was laid out. We make the next logical move. We accept outcomes as if they were inevitable. Somewhere along the way, we stop asking a simple but powerful question: does this make sense?

Lately, I have been taking more time to pause and think about my own life and experiences. Not in a nostalgic way, and not to judge myself, but to understand the decisions I made and the assumptions behind them. When I slow down, a few questions surface almost immediately.

1. Does this make sense for me now?
2. What am I afraid of?
3. Why am I hesitating to move forward?

When I revisit moments from my past, I am challenged to ask why I made certain decisions. What information did I have at the time? What beliefs was I operating from? If I were standing in that same moment today, what would I do differently?

This kind of reflection is not about regret. It is about clarity. It is about understanding the foundation you are standing on before you keep building on top of it.

Many people move through life without ever stopping to examine that foundation. We stay busy. We stay productive. We stay responsive. And yet, we rarely stop to ask whether our choices are aligned with what we actually want, value, or need.

In my coaching work, I see this pattern constantly. People make decisions and then live with the results as if they were fixed or final. They adapt to situations that no longer fit. They normalize discomfort. They tell themselves that this is just how things are.

There is another option. You can pause and ask better questions.....

In Agile work, teams intentionally build in moments to stop and reflect. We ask what is going well, what is not going well, and what we want to change moving forward. This pause is not an afterthought. It is essential to progress. Without it, teams repeat the same mistakes, carry unnecessary complexity, and burn energy without improving outcomes.

What strikes me is how rarely we apply this same practice to our own lives.

• Do you regularly ask yourself what is going well in your relationships, your work, or your routines?
• Do you notice what is not working and name it honestly?
• Do you decide what you want to continue, stop, or adjust based on what you are learning in real time?

Or do you simply keep going and hope things work themselves out?

These questions matter in every area of life. Family dynamics. Romantic relationships. Friendships. Jobs. School. Entrepreneurship. Personal growth. None of these areas are static. They are constantly changing, whether we are paying attention or not.

The goal is not to overanalyze every decision. The goal is to think clearly and thoughtfully while you are living your life, not years later when patterns are harder to change.

When you take time to reflect in real time, you give yourself options. You see choices sooner. You recognize fear when it is driving behavior. You notice when something no longer makes sense instead of forcing yourself to endure it.

This pause creates agency. It allows you to respond instead of react. It helps you make adjustments before small misalignments become major disruptions.

Thinking deeply does not slow you down. It prevents wasted motion.

If you are willing to ask yourself big questions consistently, you start living with more intention. You stop outsourcing decisions to habit, expectation, or momentum. You begin to understand why you do what you do, and that understanding gives you room to choose differently.

The invitation here is simple. Take the pause. Ask yourself what is working, what is not, and what you want to do next. Not someday. Not after things fall apart. Now.

Clarity is built in these moments. Progress follows when you are willing to act on what you see.

Benjamin Adkins, Certified Professional Coach (ACC)